<i></i> <i></i> <i></i> 0<p>In this day age women in modern societies are still daunted by the same question. Will it be marriage or career? Women are constantly put down in our patriarchal society and ambition is a virtue which is alien to the female gender even in the twenty first century. Feminism is still fighting to support women and give them equal rights as their male counterparts. As Gloria Steinham puts it, “I have yet to hear a man to ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.” Below are some reasons why women of this day and age are still puzzled by age old dilemma:</p> <h2>#1. Women tend to undermine career opportunities to be more marriageable:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-1-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>There are a certain requirements a woman needs to fulfill to be more desirable or fit for marriage. Some of these specifications include less salary, less working hours and a docile nature of the job. A forthcoming research by the Harvard economists shows that single women who thought their answers would be read by men undermined their salary by at least eighteen thousand dollars a year, stating less working hours or the number of days they wanted to spend travelling. Women who seek marriage are squeezed into a stereotypical role of being less successful and not working a full time career, so they can give more time to raising a family.</p> <h2>#2. Men always get paid higher:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-2-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>This has long been one of the key stance of feminist leaders, to reduce the wage gap between women and men, and raising their voice for an equal pay. Hollywood actresses such as Jennifer Lawrence, recently raised this issue as to why she is not paid as much as her male co stars, for instance for the popular movie the American hustle Lawrence was just paid 7% of the box office profit whereas her male co stars Bradley cooper were paid 9%. An American study demonstrated that women only earn up to 78% of their male colleagues for the same job. This proves to be highly discouraging for the new generation of women who are aspiring to be successful career oriented women.</p> <h2>#3. Women with ambitions often do not get support from the society:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-3-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>Women who are ambitious are often looked down upon by the society as if committing a grave mistake, by giving their career priority. Many women think choosing career as a full time commitment somehow makes them less capable of being called a woman. This is also one of the fronts that feminism fights for. Women are equally capable as men and can achieve anything they put their mind into. We all have heard that famous saying, behind every successful man is a woman, well it is time that woman came into the limelight for showcasing their talent and abilities.</p> <h2>#4. Marriage is considered an integral part of life:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-4-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>A woman is not complete without a marriage and children, is a very widely believed notion. Feminism does not believe in that, a woman should be free to choose what she wants to pursue in life whether it is her career or marriage. A woman is equally worthy of respect and honor whether single, divorced or married. Marriage should not be considered an important milestone in the life of a woman. This ideology can be harmful if allowed to take root into young minds. Marriage is something that is a matter of choice and should not be imposed as a mandatory requirement for girls.</p> <h2>#5. You need your partner to feel complete:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-5-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>You should not feel the need to be romantically committed to an individual in order to feel complete. Being single does not make you less of a woman. Women who choose career and education are often scrutinized in the eyes of the society as some kind of underachievers. A woman is a person as a whole who should be fully independent and functional of living on her own, supporting her needs.</p> <h2>#6. Choosing a career does not make you appear materialistic:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-6-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>Many women are thought to be running after material things when they choose to devote their time to their career instead of starting families. Choosing to invest in your future through financial security and earning, is not selfish of a woman. You should be able to afford things that you want, a nice abode without being dependant on your partner. Choosing to advance your career is not something that questions your worth as a woman. If you want a diamond ring, work hard enough till the day you can afford it yourself.</p> <h2>#7. The men are expected to financially support a household:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-7-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>Not true, both men and women should be able to equally shoulder the household responsibilities. Classically a woman shall cook and care for the children whereas the man shall step out to earn a living for the family. Both men and women should be able to have an independent career, being financially secure, so they can take the responsibility of bearing the cost of childcare.</p> <h2>#8. The biological clock is ticking:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-8-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>There is a constant pressure to settle down and start a family before you hit the forties. Women are often criticized for their shorter reproductive span, when compared to men. It is like they have a ticking biological clock, which will explode unless they have kids before forty. The failing ovarian reserve and inbound failure to ovulate governs the decisions for many women across the globe. Although the expected age of menopause for most women does not come until forty-five, the limit for settling down is much stricter, when it comes to the wider mindset.</p> <h2>#9. Raising a family is only a woman’s job:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-9-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>No it is not, it is as much the duty of a father to be responsible for their children’s upbringing. The children need both the presence of a mother and a father, when it comes to being nurtured and developing healthy attachments in childhood. Just the presence of a mother is not enough for a child, if the father is usually absent for all the important occasions such as a birthday or for holidays such as Christmas, thus both the parents hold an integral place in a child’s life.</p> <h2>#10. Career can wait, marriage comes first:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-10-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>No that is not entirely necessary. As the former first lady of the United States of America, Michelle Obama reportedly said, “If I had worried about who liked me and who thought I was cute when I was your age, I wouldn’t be married to the President of the United States.” Young girls should be taught books are to be given priority before boys and that education is always a better investment. If we nurture the talents of young women amongst us encouraging them to take up careers viewed as more manly, such as science, engineering and medicine, the society shall prosper.</p> <h2>#11. Women are somehow considered to be less intellectual:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-11-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>Unlike their male counterparts women are believed to be less able or less talented enough to make it big in this world. An experiment showed people picked more intellectual and challenging games such as cubes or a puzzle for a male infant, picking up the traditional dolls and tea sets for the girls. So this ideology of woman’s intellectual capability being less than a man’s is very deep rooted. Girls are traditionally not expected to take up physics or maths that exercise more intellect in the brain, as they are traditionally viewed as subjects boys would excel in.</p> <h2>#12. They are suspected of using “other means” to achieve success:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-12-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>Women are objectified and subjected to sexist rants. Oh got a promotion, must have slept with the boss. Any achievement that a woman earns through hard work is subject to criticism and viewed with skepticism. It is hard for a society to believe that a woman can achieve so much in life without using other unfair means to lure their way into succeeding. They are constantly harassed at work places and subjected to objectification.</p> <h2>#13. You choose to be a home maker?</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-13-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>As if working moms do not make homes, instead break them. Somehow being a full time working mom, with an advancing career undermines your status in the society as a fully devoted mother. Reinstating the fact the mother is constantly viewed as being mainly responsible for her children in addition to bearing them for nine months and giving birth. You can be a working mother and yet be a successful entrepreneur; it does not make you any less than women who choose to devote their time fully to their children. It is simply a matter of choice and free will.</p> <h2>#14 Fulfilling traditional gender stereotypes:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-14-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>Women are somehow stereotypically required to fill gender roles that traditionally require them to dedicate their time to raising a family, sacrificing their ambitions for the betterment of their children. Being career oriented is believed to be associated with the male gender traditionally. Women are required to be docile and not voice their opinions, however these notions are hugely challenged by the feminist ideals, these ideas continue to be rampant among the society.</p> <h2>#15. Not putting to use half the population</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-15-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>Women roughly make half of the eight billion population on the earth, if we do not nurture the young minds among us, it is half of the potential contributing workforce wasted. If encouraged these girls can actively contribute to the society actively participating on world forums, helping solve the global food crisis, the climate change or find a cure for the emerging diseases. But the idea of prioritizing career and education over marriage should be inculcated at a very young age, in order to bring a positive change for the society.</p> <h2>#16: Personal fulfillment and goals:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-16-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>A woman should have a personal goal in life that she may seek to fulfill, other than just her marriage and children. She should be able to do something for her own self, once the kids are grown up and eventually fly out of the nest. Many women face depression and emptiness in their life when their kids grow up, as their lives have been centered around raising a family without any personal goal, thus a fulfilling career and a job are important for a woman to have.</p> <h2>#17. A woman shouldn’t have to choose between a career or marriage:</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-17-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>It is simply centered around prioritizing different things at different time intervals. No woman should have to make this difficult choice between her career or seeking love and having a family. If a man equally shares the responsibility of the household, no woman shall be puzzled with this dilemma. Cooking and household chores should not just be a woman’s job. If feminism is practiced and women and men are granted equal rights, this shall no longer be a problem.</p> <h2>#18. So what will it be love or career?</h2> <img src="https://cdnone.netlify.com/db/2017/09/d-drafting-28-9-2197-18-jpg.jpeg"/>Shutterstock.com <p>Hopefully the points above, have rendered you capable of making your choices wisely. Whether it is marriage or career, it is essential to think about oneself, and make an informed decision. A woman should be supported and respected regardless of what she chooses to do with her time. There should be no pressure to settle down in fear of the biological clock. Most importantly it is essential that we engrave this into the minds of the young women that they have equal rights and are free to choose whatever pleases them. Freedom of speech and opinion is their right and they should willfully exercise it.</p> <i></i>